How to mock people who dishonestly rely on dictionary definitions

[Cassius Clay]

1) I wish I could have saved myself all that money on textbooks since all I really needed was a dictionary.

2) You must have thought your peers were idiots for killing their backs lugging a bunch of books around, while you chuckled to yourself because you held the one book that held the key to all knowledge in the palm of your hands.

3) Did you even need a locker in high school?

Gimme some more..

[Derived Absurdity]

Probably the best way is to say the dictionary definition of feminism is equality between men and women. They won't know what to do.